Katherine – everyday I regret that I didn’t say “yes” to you when you asked me to marry you. I think of you every day and you occupy most of my day – or at least a very large part of it. It’s far too late now.
I regret that I walked out of the house and never turned around again. You are the most beautiful woman that has ever walked the Earth and every woman I see can not measure up to you in any facet. All the women on Earth combined do not amount to even half of you. I love you. I miss you very much.
My life is nothing without you. You were my reason for living and now I am dead because I walked away and because I said “no”. There are very few things I ever regret doing. This ranks at the very top. No matter how many other women I have met, I compare each and every one of them to you and they can never measure up. If by chance you should ever read this – wherever you are, be assured that I never stopped loving you. I never will.
I wish you the best – wherever you are. My life is messed because I didn’t commit to you. 20 years later – you are the only woman who is on my mind – all the time and no amount of drugs or alcohol or work or anything else can take it away. If I had a chance to do it all over – I would not walk away. I would have stayed – as hard as it was. I would have stayed. I’ve created my own hell by simply not being with you – because I was insecure about what I can offer you.
You offered me everything and now I have nothing. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you and how beautiful you were. I will never smile again. There is a permanent disdain look in my face because of my decision and I hate it. I regret that I couldn’t be the one you needed when you needed me.
With love always.