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I regret I was an escort for six months

I am 23 years old living in Portland, Oregon. I was an escort at 18 making 500-1500 a day depending on the time and what the client wanted. I only did it for 6 months but those 6 months were the lowest point of my life. I was kicked out of my house with no money, no places to live. I was desperate to get myself together and survive the real world. So I became an escort. I heard from my friends how escort lifestyle was fun and glamorous, but I had no idea how much I was hurting myself. I would get drunk or high before any “date” and would silently cry during the dirty deed. I would only think about the money. I hated how addicting the money was, but I just kept giving myself away to these dirty men who didn’t understand and didn’t care about what I me. I still cannot forgive myself for those few months of escorting and I don’t think I ever will. I regret everything about being an escort. I’m with my boyfriend now of 2 years and he has no idea what I’ve done and I could never tell him. What hurts me the most is how amazing he is and how much he loves me and how perfect he thinks I am. I completely disrespected myself and my body. I feel dirty all the time. I wish I was not an escort.

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