When I was an escort I did mostly a combination of massage and BDSM. I am mostly glad to be out, but I miss the feeling of being pretty and maintaining enough prowess to get men to pay for me. Especially the ones those paid me to beat and berate them. I worked as an escort in Prince George and then moved to North Vancouver. I would travel to Nanaimo or Victoria too, as high class hired escort depending on the price and if the client was paying for my trip. Money was very good but since I specialized in fetish I met some interesting and powerful people of the society. My very first call to escort was for a scary looking guy who showed me newspaper articles online about how he’d gotten in troubles with law, and then smoked some pot, and then couldn’t get off. Even after half an hour of me screwing him up his ass with his toys, he couldn’t get it hard. He was also smelly. When I went down to give him a blowjob, I almost gagged. So I ended up giving him handjob. That was one of my worst appointments throughout my escort career. Can’t believe I kept going. Now I look back and laugh. I don’t regret anything.

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I have been married to my husband for 3 years, have a beautiful girl together, living in Victoria, and my secret is that my husband raped me, or at least that is how I feel. He took advantage of me and, despite my protests, raped me. I stared at the ceiling while he held me down and prayed for it to be over. I don’t know why but that night we were fooling around after our daughter went to bed. All of a sudden I just didn’t want to do anything. I know I lead him onto it but still I thought he would stop when I said no. I haven’t told anyone about this till now. I don’t have any friends because I moved here from Vanderhoof with my husband. I left all my friends and family back there and no one to talk about this. A lot of people have asked, if I’d ever been abused or taken advantage of sexually and I can’t bring myself to admit that I have been raped by my husband. I want so badly to believe that I am one of those women who’d never been raped or abused. Just now I’m realizing how much it affects me all the time. I can’t concentrate. I don’t feel anything for my husband but I used to love him with my life. I don’t even know if this is rape or not. A part of me thinks it’s not the other part thinks it is. I tried to tell myself that he is my husband, so he had the right, but I feel like he took something I can’t get back. I can’t bring myself to admit that he had that power over me. I wish I could come to at peace with it. It may lead us to divorce. He did apologize about it after but still that is not enough. We had full-filling sex after the incident too but still that incident really messes me up.

After reading all the confessions and secrets on this site, I finally have the courage to confess my own secret. I have been a happily married woman for the past three years, I have a very high sex drive and a satisfying sex life with my husband, but I secretly feel like I want more adventure in my sex life. I frequently have the urge to have sex with another man, just some random guy. I love sex, and would just like to know how it would be with another man. I have been with my husband for over 8 years (married for three years) and I am only 25 and I really would love to screw some random guy just to see what it was like, how it compared to my husband. If he were married, that would be even better! After reading all the experiences on this site about No Strings Attached, I am seriously considering trying something like that and having a secret onetime affair. The thought of it is driving me crazy with longing! I’m to afraid of being caught if I do it in Quesnel though because it’s such a small town but I’ve been fantasizing about traveling to different cities like Prince George, Williams Lake or even Vancouver, or Victoria. If I found someone I liked through a website, I’d make an excuse to go see him, but I don’t want to do anything in this Quesnel, it’s just too small. I am glad to have finally confessed my secret.

I am 27 year old female, living in Edmonton. I moved here with my husband after we got married, from Victoria. I married him against my father’s advice. He was right. I have two beautiful children with my husband but I wish he was not their father. I am stuck in a marriage with a guy who is unable to grow up, who can’t support himself much less his family, and I left all my friends and family for him. I always make excuses for him and for myself for being with him. I blame myself for this. Now I am thinking I need help to get away and leave him. I can’t afford to leave or divorce him because of my children and I can’t afford to stay because of myself. I feel like I am trapped in this relationship. My dad was right and I wish I listened to him. My dad told me he’s a looser and he is!

I met my husband after I had an affair on Ashley Madison and cheated on my then boyfriend. I left my boyfriend in Prince Rupert and moved in with this guy in Victoria and eventually we got married. Before getting married both husband and I decided we wanted kids. We had dreams and chatted a lot about it. A few months after our wedding, I told my husband that I was ready to start a family, but he asked me to wait a few more years, as he was going to school and had yet to start a career. I was 3 years older than him. I was very disappointed when he asked to wait, and few months later I told him that I couldn’t wait, that I wanted to have a baby now. He asked me to wait few more years! I had no choice as I didn’t want to “force” him into this. For two years, I thought about it deeply and seriously, and decided that I didn’t want kids after all. I told him that I was never going to have kids that I had changed my mind, and he was totally shocked He didn’t expect this from me. We, of course, had a fight over it. He says that I have misled him and he wouldn’t have married me if I had told him that I never wanted children. We still stayed together because of our love for each other. He finished his school, found a great career, and he is ready to have a family, but not me. We are not fighting all the time about starting a family. I’m getting close to 40 and I still have not changed my mind. For some reasons, I am very happy about my decision. I should feel bad that I lied to get married to him but still I don’t feel bad.