My story begins with an old love. We all have had them, we continue on and from time to time wonder how they are doing. My thoughts however, never went away.  I longed to be with him. I was envious of him. I wanted him to be mine. When I heard he was getting married, I had to get married. It was that bad. I thought of him most of my days. During my commute to work, during my interactions with my husband and even while we had sex. Needless to say this was taking a toll on the relationship with my husband. I did not care that was not my focus at the time.

One summer day while visiting Prince George where he still lived I had a desire to see him. I knew where he lived with his wife and children and drove by the home. To my luck he was outside mowing the lawn. I could not resist I had to stop and say hello at least. He was concerned what the neighbours would say about a strange women stopping by so we went inside to talk. The passions were still there. We started kissing. The guilt rose in me, this was a married man.  I then thought, but he was mine first. So we locked the doors while his children played outside. We enjoyed a wild sexual encounter on his living room floor. I know I should have stopped there. I could not resist the temptations. I continued to see him for a few weeks. Finally my conscience told me this was not okay. I cut off our communications for many months. Allowing him to be happy with his wife that he loved  very much. I tried to rebuild my relationship but to no avail. I left my husband.

I was visiting my mother another visit to the city and the phone rang. It was him. He was trying to contact me to tell me his wife and he had split up. That he would really like to see me again. We met up and of course landed ourselves in bed. It was a day we will never forget. It was purely sexual at the time however resulted in something we did not expect. We failed to use protection and I became pregnant. I knew he did not love me the way I wanted him to. I could not expect him to be a father to a child that was created from adultery and lust. We made a big decision and chose to abort the child. As we went to the clinic together that day and handed the nurse the money our child was no longer. Even though it was the best decision at the time, to this day I wonder about what our 2 year old child would be like today.

Tags: Prince George, Saskatoon, Vancouver

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This entry was posted on Monday, March 15th, 2010 at 2:14 pm and is filed under Cheating. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.