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Wish I was not an escort

I am 22 years old, and escorting to pay for my university and expenses. I started when I was 18, after my parents got divorced. My dad and I moved to Reno, Nevada from California. I stayed with him but he didn’t do anything to provide for me. I attended the University of Nevada. It was expensive. I had to find a way to survive. I lie to my boyfriend and people around me by saying that my parents give me monthly allowance but little did they knew that I am an escort! I throw tantrums and get angry on days I have to satisfy clients and my boyfriend thinks t that happens because I am a spoiled – selfish brat. My issues surface especially when I drink and I get depressed. Then I get violent. I don’t want sympathy from him or anyone, just understanding but I can never reveal this to him or confess to anyone about my secrets. I just want a normal boyfriend and girlfriend relationship with him with no lies. I dont think the relationship would last if I confess to my secret to my boyfriend. Who wants an escort to be their girlfriend? I want to share this secret and take this burden off my chest. After all, tomorrow will still come and I can’t face my clients with teary eyes. This is my first step of working towards accepting me and being happy. I wish I had other ways to provide for myself other than being an escort.

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