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Confession to my children

To Ethan, my 9 year old prince in shining armour, and my beautiful 7 year old princess Emma:

I am so very sorry for not being able to buy you the video game you wanted yesterday. You have no idea what it made me feel like but if I was buying you that game, we wouldn’t be eating dinner today. I know you wanted it so very badly and you both deserve it.

I am sorry that you two amazing children are being brought up in a single mom’s home. I really tried to be with your father but it was really not working. I am really sorry.

I am sorry that when you ask for your father, I lie and say that he is working, when he really is not. He just does not want to do anything with us. He tried to abuse you both. I would protect you from anything harming you. That is the real reason why I left your dad, but I dont have the courage to expalin it to you. I am sorry.

Ethan, I am sorry that I have never been able to afford to put you soccer or hockey or any organized sports. Everytime we take the bus around the soccer field and CN Center, I see the joy your little eyes expresses. I really wish I could afford to put you in it. I know how good you would be. I know you will be the happiest boy. Emma, I am sorry I can’t put you to dance classes or say no when your entire class is going to camping. I can’t afford it right now. I am sorry for not having any money for fun things.

I am sorry for having you spend so much time at daycare and Nana’s when I had to work late. I am sorry for being so tired all of the time and not being able to play with you both all the time. I know all you want to do is just some time with me, but I cant lose my job, otherwise we will have no roof over our head.

I am sorry that we had to change our entire lifestyle since I got laid off. But trust me, I tried everything I could, but I failed. I am sorry that I still cannot get a good job.

I dont even want to think about the Christmas.

Please be patient, things will get better, I am praying. I love you both.


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One Response to “Confession to my children”

  1. Anonymous Says:

    I am very sorry about your situation, it saddens me to hear this. I am sending all my good karma to you and may things look better from here on in.

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